


What can I say? The dude loves worms.

by fabric_hands



Category: Deltarune (Video Game)
Genre: crackfic, shitpost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-04
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-08-17 12:47:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16516763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fabric_hands/pseuds/fabric_hands
Summary: aka Susie eats some worms and Rouxls loses his mind





	What can I say? The dude loves worms.

Kris entered the shop hesitantly, Ralsei and Susie following behind. They needed supplies, and they aimed to collected before making their way into the castle. With everything happening right now— fighting enemies, solving puzzles, and trying to keep their unruly team in order, Kris was honestly a little stressed. They didn’t want more complications than they needed.

Their encounter with Rouxls Kaard still fresh in their mind, they sighed in slight annoyance when they saw who it was reclining on the floor.

”Welcome to my shop,” he smiled charmingly. “Thou ungrateful worms.”

Kris didn’t bother signing anything to him, and instead just browsed his shop. In and out, then they would be gone.

”Hey again.” Susie said nonchalantly, observing a large axe haphazardly leaning out of a barrel.

”Hello, Mr. Kaard.” Ralsei said politely.

”Don’t you have some puzzles to be duking?” Susie asked, crossing her arms. “Why are you... uh... reclining comfortably... on the floor of this shop?”

”I am this shoppe’s proprietor!” Kaard said extravagantly. “This store is mine castle, metaphorically speaking, and thine hath stumbled into it.”

Some castle, Kris thought.

”What wares might I intereste thy worms in today?” He grinned. “Mine artifacts art quite potent.”

”We appreciate it, thanks.” Ralsei smiled. He looked over to Kris, who was pretending to look carefully at Kaard’s items. “Do we need anything specific, Kris?”

Kris shook their head no, and continued looking around.

”Why even sell to us, anyway?” Susie grunted, hefting the ace over her shoulder, testing its weight.

“Ha ha ha! To amasseth funds, worms! An army of funds!” He laugher haughtily. “So I may crushest thou like Fermented Grapes, into the most delicious adult beverage— revenge.”

”Uh-huh.” Susie droned, doing a couple of test swings with the axe. She swung it like a baseball bat.

”Oh, how I amuse myself.” He wiped away an imaginary tear.

”Well, I wish you luck in crushing us, sir.” Ralsei smiled. “And we will buy your things if it’ll help!”

Kris scoffed and rolled their eyes.

”Why thank you, worm!” Rouxls sat up. “Thine insignificant, pithy praise is quite meaningful!”

 _Could you please stop,_ Kris signed at him. They doubted that Rouxls even knew ASL, but it was worth a shot.

The hand movements catching his attention, Kaard squinted. “Art thou attempting to cast a spell with thine finger movements?” He asked. “Because no magick is procuring.”

Kris just let out an angry sigh, clenched their fists, and turned around.

”Where did you get all this junk?” Susie rested a boot on a box nearby. “This all looks like crap.”

”Ah!” Kaard exclaimed. “One monster’s crap is another monster’s—“

”Still crap.” She snarled. “But I’m taking this axe.”

“Do not interrupte me, worm.” Rouxls held out his hand. “Thate will be—“

”It won’t be anything,” She grimaced. “Because I’m the one holding the axe.”

Rouxls recoiled. “Fair point.”

While Susie was threatening Rouxls, Ralsei looked curiously at a jar on the ground. It had a large cork stuck in the top. He picked it up, and squinted at what he saw wriggling in it.

”Worms?” He asked.

Rouxls grinned widely and grabbed the jar. “Yes! Mine pride and mine joy, these worms. I am a bugkeeper. So I am keeping these bugs.”

”Interesting.” Ralsei said sincerely. 

Susie squinted. “You... like worms? But you call us worms all the time.”

”yes. Thou art worms, insignificant and inconsequential under my feet.”

”But you like those worms.”

”I would die for them.”

Kris, groaning internally, just plucked a ribbon off of the shelves as something to buy. They just wanted to leave before Kaard said anything irritating again.

They stopped up to Rouxls and thrusted out the hand with the ribbon in it toward him. If he didn’t understand sign, he could figure out basic movements.

”Ah, I thank thou for actually paying for thine purchase!” Kaard smiled. “That will—“

Before he could finish, Susie snatched the jar from the distracted Rouxls. She uncorked the lid, and shook out the jar into her mouth as if she were eating candy.

Rouxls shrieked. Ralsei exclaimed “Oh, my!”

Kris smiled so widely, and had an incredible urge to give Susie a high-five.


End file.
